This new hair gel is working out greeeeaaaatt
Middle of Kindergarten Cop:
When did he go from being a teacher to becoming a cop?
Girl with the Dragon Tattoo:
So this girl can hack into any computer and move billions of dollars around between accounts buuut she still has to blow her parole officer for her monthly allowance?
I have all these shitty annoying messages on my phone…listen to this:
“Let’s Skype later, maybe around 8 or 9? Love – Mom
I’ve got this new girlfriend but she’s so ugly. She’s a 6 at best and she’ll probably cheat on me.
Hey guys I brought over some beer! You like bud light lime?
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